Carolina Monteiro is not the typical case of someone who wanted to study Medicine since she was born. With a great passion for Cinema, she chose to study Science, an area where she felt she could be of more use to others. And while, on the one hand, it may seem tempting to have a wide range of career prospects, on the other hand, Carolina says that this creates an internal conflict which makes it hard to find out which are one's real interests in life. It was only in the 11th grade that she got a glimpse of clinical practices, learning that sometimes making decisions means excluding various options. "Medicine is not my first passion, but it's what I'm best at", she says. Clearly a perfectionist, she says that lack of quality immediately causes stress. Despite being an only child and the only girl in her family, only recently seconded by a cousin, she believes that she needs her own space, despite naturally missing her parents and her dogs, of whom she speaks as if they were relatives. Born in Castelo Branco, she would no longer trade the big city for her hometown, because she has a thirst for knowledge and culture that, according to her, are not as easily available in small towns.
She is learning German because she wants to go on Erasmus in her 5th year; her mother lived in Germany for a few years and tried to raise Carolina as bilingual, but it was Carolina herself who always refused to interact with a second language. She clearly loves challenges. I met her on Applicant's Day because she signed up to be one of the mentors who welcomes the new 12th grade students who visit the Faculty. As mentor, she guides them during that day and gives an academic tour, showing the nooks and crannies of the faculty to the young students. She also wants to chart new paths, so being an Erasmus student is one of her goals, but she knows that this challenge comes with barriers that need to be overcome. Language is her big challenge right now, since mastering technical terms in German is no easy task for someone who has never learned them before. But this is a unique opportunity and she doesn't want to waste it.
She's independent enough not to see herself spending long periods of time under her parents' wings anymore, because joining the Faculty of Medicine forced her to create new dynamics and to share spaces and different habits. Whilst, in the first apartment, her flatmates were too festive, not allowing her to focus as much as she needed, her current flatmates are too silent. This is a sign that Carolina has also changed in the course of her first two years of studies. Leaving one's parents' house has both a social and a financial cost; in round figures, living in a room in Lisbon can easily cost €400 a month, excluding meals and transportation costs.
In parallel with her academic training, she continues to look for a course in the area of Cinematography; passionate about auteur cinema, seeing fiction on the big screen is almost like a second food to her.
She says that she's very pessimistic but doesn't seem so, with a vibrant look that seems to have come straight out of a Harry Potter film, and I tell her that; she replies that it's the glasses that give her that image, but it's not, it's her curious and attentive attitude, always fast-paced and inquisitive.
I saw her on Applicant's Day as she led a group of students and it was the magic she put on everything she told that made me look for her again. She surely made a difference on that day, at least in the mind of a future new student.
Why was it important for you to be part of the Applicant's Day mentor group?
Carolina Monteiro: For us, as mentors, it's always a good thing, because we have a different perspective on the Faculty, we have a different experience. We get in touch with new people who might have the same interest as us. On the other hand, I'd say that an open day without the perspective and monitoring of someone who is already studying here would be of little value for students. Their perspective on the Faculty would hardly correspond to reality. They would visit a couple of spaces but wouldn't get a realistic overview of things.
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Did you come to Applicant's Day when you were a 12th grader?
Carolina Monteiro: Yes, and then I applied for the Faculty and got in that year. But what I saw on that day had little to do with what the Faculty actually is. There's a great emphasis on the iMM, which is indeed one of the Faculty's major assets, but we don't get in touch with them that often. I'd say that it's more about showing the opportunities that the faculty has to offer than about showing its day-to-day routines.
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What could we do on Applicant's Day to bring the students closer to our reality?
Carolina Monteiro: It's not easy, because it's only one day and with time limits it's not possible to show our routines.
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What caught your attention on your Applicant's Day?
Carolina Monteiro: Listening to the older students and their stories, understanding their study habits and how they created them. One of the things we wanted to know at the time, and which is still important, is how one studies here. And no Professor will tell you that, they will tell you to read the bibliography, but the fact is that no one has time to read 9 books. (Laughs) Another concern that is common among newcomers is to understand what academic traditions are like here. There are lots of people concerned with that.
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And what are academic traditions like here?
Carolina Monteiro: I can never give a good answer to that because I never took part in them and I don't know enough about the subject to clear any doubts. The students are not very interested in that. There are a lot of people taking part in academic traditions in the first year, but then most of them give them up because they have to deal with many projects and tasks at the same time.
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What was your greatest shock when you got in after a joyful day like Applicant's Day?
Carolina Monteiro: It was not so much adjusting my study method, because it was already quite solid, but dealing with Anatomy, which must be studied in a different way, and I still think that I don't know how to study Anatomy properly. (Laughs) Then I had to learn how to reconcile extra-curricular activities with the academic life, because the medical course is very time-consuming. It's funny, when we get together with friends from the Faculty, we usually end up talking about our course and we realise how difficult it is to reconcile these two lives.
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And are you able to reconcile them?
Carolina Monteiro: Last year I wasn't, but this year I was. The first semester last year...(thinking)
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It's very hard for newcomers?
Carolina Monteiro: I'd have to say yes. It obviously depends on your goals, but I'd have to say yes. Of course there are always people who don't make it to the end, but I think you can look at it from two different perspectives: those who get here in the first semester and are a bit lost and all they want to do is to enjoy and go to all the parties, and then there are those who get so scared by the sheer amount of work that they don't do anything else, which is what happened to me. I studied all the time.
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Were you depressed during this period?
Carolina Monteiro: I wasn't in a good place, psychologically speaking, I was always at home, studying; I didn't even come here to study, I was always at home. If you do nothing but study, you get disillusioned.
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How did you solve that problem?
Carolina Monteiro: I got used to it. In the first semester of the 1st year I worked hard and had very good grades. And because I passed all the subjects on the first attempt, I had a two-week break between semesters. But I was so exhausted that I couldn't do anything! I literally lied on the couch the whole time. I was too tired and I knew I wouldn't be able to study at the same pace as before. I think it was my body forcing me to make a commitment, so I slowed down the pace and, little by little, I let go. I kept working, but I stopped being almost obsessed. And I ended up achieving the same results, maybe my average dropped two tenths, but it's not relevant. The work overload wasn't worth it.
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Did you make any friends in your 1st year or didn't you even have time for that?
Carolina Monteiro: No, none. In the 1st semester I was totally isolated. I only met a few people from Castelo Branco who were here with me, but we hadn't even been friends back home. I started making friends in my 2nd year. But there's a lot of us, we're almost 400, it takes time.
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Did you often get lost in these buildings?
Carolina Monteiro: Get lost here? Not in Egas Moniz, but in the Hospital I still get lost sometimes! (Laughs loudly)
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Are you dealing with the 2nd year in a more relaxed way?
Carolina Monteiro: Oh, yes! I used to put a lot of pressure on myself because I believed I couldn't make mistakes or fail a subject. But I no longer look at that as a disaster; if it happens, and if I have to make a second attempt, I no longer feel like it's the end of the world.
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You talked about pressure; did that pressure come from you or your family?
Carolina Monteiro: In my case, it came from me. Some of my colleagues are pressured by their families, but my parents have never set targets for me to achieve certain results or do more. No!
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If you were challenged to tell new students what you went through in your first year, would you speak in front of a packed auditorium?
Carolina Monteiro: Yes! I would accept it, but I don't know if it would be beneficial. Because an account of a 1st year, with rare exceptions, is never very positive. (Starts laughing) When some of my colleagues found out that I was going to be a mentor on Applicant's Day, they said "don't frighten the newcomers". Because I'm a little pessimistic and I suffer with certain things, mainly Anatomy, where grades don't seem to be very fair.
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How is that?
Carolina Monteiro: My first oral examination didn't go very well, I actually cried in the room and my grade was quite reasonable. Then in the 2nd semester I was more prepared because I had finally been able to study everything, but I had only read everything once and maybe I was lucky with the questions they asked me because I got a better grade; I guess I was lucky with the questions.
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Is it also a matter of luck with the Professors you meet along the way?
Carolina Monteiro: Of course! The Professors we feel closer to are the ones who teach practical and theoretical/practical subjects, because there are less students per class and students are not very fond of theoretical classes. As we get more and more work to do, we get to a point where no one attends those classes.
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And why does that happen?
Carolina Monteiro: For various reasons. We have lots of work to do, we have to prepare oral presentations, so we're not able to study, take oral exams and then attend theoretical classes. So each student chooses the classes they attend very carefully. And that has a lot to do with the Professors who are teaching them. I'll give you some examples, Professor Bruno (Silva-Santos); his classes are always full, most students attend his classes. He's great, it's very easy for him to pass on information, he's didactic, he interacts with us and forces us to think, he creates a good atmosphere in the classroom. We always learn something, but not everything, because his mind works three times faster than ours. (Laughs) And he records his classes so we can keep up with everything, he's fantastic! Then there are Professors who give PowerPoint presentations and simply read, or pass on odd pieces of information In these cases we think, "I can read this at home, and I'll read it faster" and that's on what we base our time-management decisions.
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Are there any other Professors who create a vibrant atmosphere in the classroom?
Carolina Monteiro: Professor Miguel Castanho! I attended all his classes! I didn't skip class once, because he's great and uses a book of which he is a co-author; he really focuses on the book, shows the pictures and gives solid explanations. At the end of each class he'll stay for 10/15 minutes clearing doubts, he's available for us. I also attended all of Professor Maria do Carmo's classes; the Molecular Biology exam is a written exam with only two or three multiple choice questions, so you have to pay a lot of attention. Attending her classes helps a lot, because she teaches things that are not in the books and we can only learn them in her classes. And I can't fail to mention Professor Hélia Neves, from Histology and Biology of Development, because I'm really fond of her. She's an excellent teacher, she's very understanding.
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And is there anyone who makes you stand at attention?
Carolina Monteiro: Professor Maria do Carmo gives that impression at first, because talking in her classes is not an option, if there is a buzz she'll actually ask people to leave the classroom. Then there's Anatomy and some practical classes where some Professors create uncomfortable atmospheres. Some of them don't even let you interrupt their classes, there are cases where they will only let you ask questions at the end. But most Professors do know how to teach.
As she comes into contact with new subjects, Carolina says she feels like a 4-year old child, choosing a different profession every week. Each subject that fascinates her makes her think that she wants to follow that speciality. One thing is for sure, she wants to stay in the clinical area, but she still has the whole world to discover and find the right path. She left her fear and anxiety behind and managed to move on. Next year she'll be available once again to welcome the newcomers. And maybe tell them about some of the experiences she's just shared with me.
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Joana Sousa
Editorial Team
